Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Feel Free to Laugh at My Pain

Second runner-up for title of this post: Sports Injuries 101
And the First runner-up for title of this post, please remember that in the event that the title of this post is unable to fulfill its duties as Post Title, the First Runner-up will take over. That having been said, the First Runner-up for title of this post is...................... *drumroll*................ Masochism and Me. (I hope someone out there in blogger land found that at least half as amusing as me.)

So, most of my loyal readers know that I have been into various sports throughout my life, some more dangerous than others. When I was swimming and in the early stages of learning to do a flip turn, I once got too close to the wall and scraped my back along the tile of the side of the pool. No blood or anything, but big long scratch marks all the way down my back.

In my many years of playing softball I managed to completely kill my knees, but other than that, 3 injuries stand out. At the ripe ol' age of 8 I headed out to my very first little league softball practice. I had never played a competitive sport, let alone one that involved balls traveling very quickly toward me. My very first practice the coach sent me up to try to bat. I was one of the youngest and smallest girls on the team, and obviously the most inexperienced (they had already had several practices by the time I got signed up). I confidently marched up to the plate (after the coach showed me where to stand), bat in hand ready to go. One of the teams pitchers (and one of the oldest, strongest, most experienced girls on the team) threw a pitch. I gripped the bat, took a swing and BAM! The ball hit my thumb. I look down to see a dime size chunk of skin desperately trying to keep itself attached to me. A normal kid would have said... that's about enough ball for me... but I played for another nine years.

The next softball injury came a few years later. I was running the bases and made a waaaay too late decision to slide into 2nd. Because I didn't have time to get my body rotated properly, my shin slid smack into the side of the base. For literally the next 2 months the entire length, and half the width of my shin was a rainbow of colored bruises. I think I saw every color in the spectrum on my leg during that time... it was PRETTY!!!! I think I should have investigated more... I'm fairly certain it could have been a world record... longest lasting, most colorful bruise that meant nothing. It wasn't during a game, it was practice, so really.. it was all for nothing.

Finally, we were playing a game and had exhausted all of our usual pitchers. A new girl had just moved and joined the team and she was a pitcher so the coach sent her out to give her a try. By this point in my softball years I was playing one position and one position only. I was the catcher. We were still definitely little league and hadn't progressed to giving each other signs for pitches, but I had gotten used to most of our pitchers and knew what to expect from them. Unfortunately I hadn't had the opportunity to catch for this girl yet. She had a mean drop ball! Especially for an 11 year old. I unfortunately wasn't ready for it and didn't move my mitt fast enough. The ball came flying in and hit toes (one of the few body parts that a catcher doesn't have anything on to protect). The ball went rolling away and I started to run after it but immediately fell to the ground. Once the play was stop I pulled off my cleat and my sock to discover that my big toenail was flipped backwards. I flipped it back down and got it bandaged up to finish the game, but I'll never forget the weird feeling of not being able to stand up. All because of a toenail. Weird!

Recently Will and I have begun playing Racquetball. It's AWESOME! So much fun, and such a good workout. So about a week and half ago we're playing and Will makes a particularly nice shot that sends me scrambling across the court. I figured I'd kinda slide/dive for it (it was my only chance) like I did in the good ol' softball days. I don't know if you know this.... but shin guards and dirt are much more conducive to sliding than bare knees and gym floors. My knees hit the ground a few inches from the wall. My knees and lower body stopped as soon as I hit the floor. Sadly, physics cause my upper body to remain in motion and propelled me, elbow first, in the wall. I still have bruise. AWESOME!

My most recent injury came just a couple days ago. We're playing racquetball and it's my serve. I serve the ball and turn to move out of the service box. I glance back to see where Will is and just as my head turns to face him.... BAM!!!! Ball to the mouth! HE HIT ME WITH THE BALL!!!!!!!!! IN THE MOUTH!!!! After realizing that my lips were still attached, I did a teeth check, they were all still there and didn't seem to be loose or anything. From the feeling (or lack there of) of my lips I was certain that I was going to wake up the next morning with purple Angelina Jolie lips. The next day, to my surprise, they were pretty much ok (no free lip plumping for me).

So there you have it. Feel free to laugh at my pain. But if you are going to laugh... I think it's only fair that you leave mean comments on Will's Myspace page. Mean comments for 1) hitting me in the mouth and 2) abandoning blogger to join Myspace. Moral of the story? Don't hit your racquetball partner in the mouth!! It's mean and it hurts!!!